There is a pain you can’t think your way out of. You can’t talk it away. If there was someone to talk to. You can walk. One foot the other foot. Breathe in breathe out. Drink from the stream. Piss. Eat the venison strips. And. You can’t metabolize the loss. It is in the cells of your face, your chest, behind the eyes, in the twists of the gut. Muscles, sinew, bone. It is all of you. When you walk you propel it forward. When you let the sled and sit on a fallen log and. You imagine him curling in the one patch of sun maybe lying over your feet. Then it sits with you, the Pain puts its arm over your shoulders. It is your closest friend. Steadfast. And at night you can’t bear to hear your own breath unaccompanied by another and underneath the big stillness like a score is the roaring of the cataract of everything being and being torn away. Then. The Pain is lying beside your side, close. Does not bother you with sound even of breathing. Peter Heller
About This Quote

The fact that the pain never leaves is not an advantage. The pain is a constant reminder of how much you love someone and how much they should be included in your life. It should be a comfort, not a burden. However, because you can’t think your way out of the pain and you can’t talk it away, and there is no one to talk to, or even walk with you, it is impossible to get out of the despair and sadness that comes with the pain.

It is all-consuming. In the end, the only thing that will bring relief from the pain is actually being in it. Moving forward means facing up to what you have lost.

Source: The Dog Stars

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More Quotes By Peter Heller
  1. Is it possible to love so desperately that life is unbearable? I don't mean unrequited, I mean being in the love. In the midst of it and desperate. Because knowing it will end, because everything does. End.
  2. I think now that maybe true sweetness can only happen in limbo.
  3. There might not be a measure of happiness left in a life, but there could be beauty and grace and endless love.
  4. If there is nothing else there is this: to be inundated, consumed.
  5. When we are most scared is the time to summon our clearest concentration and move forward, not back.
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